Monday, January 31, 2011

blueberry muffins and burnt dinners

If you ask my husband, he probably won't agree just to be nice, but I am a terrible baker. I can manage to burn things that are in the oven for mere seconds. I promise. Cookies, bread, muffins, casseroles, (although I am getting better at these), rolls, cake. The list could go on...

I have realized lately that it's not about the burnt dinners, or in the case of this morning, burnt muffins. It's about making the time to do this anyways. See, my husband and I? We stay really busy during the week...between nursing school, my work at the University, managing artists, and my husband's job, we usually leave the house around 6 and get home around the same time. It's really hard to want to cook or clean the house when I am exhausted and facing homework and a full inbox. I had a good cry about this the other day, since as every nursing student knows, you need a good cry about every 3 weeks. It's how you survive. Anyways, I had a good sized pity party where I lamented being a failure to my patient husband. Between gulping sobs, I explained how I felt like I was slacking as a student, where my grades were steady B's, at work, where I sleepily move through my day, and as a manager, whom my artists had to work around my hectic schedule. And lastly, I bawled, as a wife. Husband, though sympathetic, doesn't let me wallow. It's one of his best traits. I am a DRAMA QUEEN, and I know it! He listened patiently, and then pointed out that I am not failing, I am just managing my time poorly. That is DEFINITELY not what i wanted to hear, but it was right on.
I DO have time to cook and clean, it just means I need to prioritize my family.

The Lord calls married women to be homemakers, plain and simple. To honor our husbands with the gifts that He has given us that our dear husbands, no matter how wonderful they are, simply are not given. if we are married, we are called to serve this way and find joy in being a
wife.

Not fashionistas, perfect bakers, daily bloggers, or career women, (though those things can have their rightful place), but FIRSTLY homemakers.

I know there are those girls who blog daily and always have a perfect house, and manage to squeeze in social time, and still stay right on their household budget. They aren't me, friends.

On the other hand, some women take this to the OTHER extreme, and look with disdain on women who do have careers or who are getting their higher education. I think that too is unGodly. I know God has distinctly called me to do the things i am doing, and I do them well to serve Him. It's sad that people believe you have to be one or the other.

After reading sweet Kelly Needham's blog (Kelly is the wife of recording artist Jimmy Needham, and new mommy to Lively!), I was challenged to be a better wife. Kelly talked about her recent struggle with avoiding the tasks of her home. She, like me, made sure she had load of excuses to avoid housework, regular cooking, and various household tasks because she was so busy. At the brink of exhaustion, like me, she talked about how she felt like because she worked full time, she "deserved" to leave those other tasks undone because she was so tired. And since her husband was away much of the time, it meant she could slack off even more. She was convicted about her time outside her home as well. I find myself making these excuses: "Well, our house is so small!", and "we are tightly on a budget this month", "Well, we don't have kids yet" and "I'm so tired". Since we've been married, I am home a lot. partly because I am exhausted, and mostly because I enjoy being with my husband. BUT, I do have a terrible habit of working while at home. Email, homework, misc articles...they all find ways to consume me while I'm on the couch. Just because I work full time and go to school, doesn't mean my sweet husband doesn't need a clean house, an organized budget, and a little effort on my part to stop napping in sweatpants at the end of the day. I know I feel better when i put a little makeup on, do my hair, and put actual clothing on, and i know he appreciates it too. Even when the muffins are burnt, and dinner is a few minutes later, I can make the move to be more home-centered.

It's going to take a lot more effort, but I know i can definitely improve my poor attitude when it comes to
cultivating my household. How about you?

1 comment:

Leslie said...

There was a time that I jokingly refered to myself as the "Freezer Queen". It seemed like I was always defrosting something. With 2 jobs, four kids and 53 pieces of laundry a day, I was never caught up. I still get up putting a load in the washer, and go to bed taking them out of the dryer. The loads are just smaller now.You will make it Grace.Save the fancy cooking for off days, nuke what you can,have waffles at night, use paper plates, and cuddle with your hubby.And turn off both computers when you do. Much love!